Tuesday, December 9, 2014

MRI, Miracles, and Angels

September 2 was our MRI appointment.  I was very nervous about it.  The doctors told me that it was a pretty safe procedure and it didn’t use radiation. However I had also heard of many people who have had them and experienced extreme headaches after.  Shaun and I had prayed super hard that all would be ok. Dr. Glen the Oncologist said that this appointment could last 3 hours, so that also made me nervous.  I've never had an MRI before but everyone who had told me how loud it was. Just before they took us back to change they took us in a little room and had us sign a waiver.  They had to do a special consultation since I was pregnant, letting us know what we were doing and making sure we were ok with it...this didn't exactly strengthen my confidence in the "this is completely safe for your baby" idea.  
They took me to a changing room and gave me this gown and told me to take everything off but my underwear.  I was a little confused because as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I don't wear your normal underwear. I wear garments (a religious top with cap sleeves and bottoms that go to the knees that are worn under your clothes). I wondered if I should leave them on or not.  I peaked my head out and asked Shaun what he thought and he was thinking they probably would want them off.  I agreed and began to change when I had the thought, “Don’t take them off, leave them on.”  I took a minute to consider where that thought had come from. As I did I remembered the promised blessings that come from wearing them worthily - I decided to leave them on. 
They took me back and told me it should only last about 45min to an hour. I was so relieved.  I lay on my back and they got me all situated and then moved me into this long tube.  I haven’t ever been claustrophobic until that moment.  I just started to feel a little panic set in. I tried to just concentrate on breathing and relaxing all while focusing on the opening at the end of the tube above my head. (This is great practice for childbirth.) I was able to gain control when they started a little test run.  I had asked for the headphones and I wanted to listen to classical music. However when the noise started it didn’t matter what I was listening to. The machine was so LOUD!  I was so startled…it was nothing like I had imagined. 
I got through the practice test and then they started the real thing.  All of the sudden I got super nervous again.  I was worried about my baby and things started feeling really tight again.  I thought, "I'm going to push this button and tell them I don’t want to do this anymore."  I started to say a little  prayer that my baby would be safe and I would be able to calm down. The night before I was expressing my fear for the baby and this test to my sister Niki. She told me that I should pray for guardian angels to protect me and my baby. I did just that while I was laying in that tube. Right then I remembered that I was wearing my garments, and I remembered the promised blessings of protection that they provide.  I also became very aware that I was not alone in that tube.  I could feel the presence of heavenly angels surrounding me and my baby.  I knew that we both had the protection of heaven and all was going to be fine.  It was one of the most spiritual experiences I have ever had. I calmed down immediately and then I noticed in my headphones that there were beautiful hymns playing.  
In the Doctrine and Covenants 84:88 it says, "...I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up."  I had experienced this promise exactly this day, and was I was filled with peace. Needless to say the rest of the MRI was a breeze.  In fact a couple times they asked me if I was breathing cause I was so relaxed.
    I couldn’t wait to tell Shaun about this amazing experience and as I did of course my emotions got the best of me and once again we were both reminded that Heavenly Father truly knew who we are and what we go through. I was so humbled and grateful.
When we got home that night I ran to a Relief Society dinner our ward was putting on.  I hadn’t been home very much but I felt like I should really go because the sisters in the ward had been so supportive and kind and I never see them because I am in Young Women's.  So I went. I really couldn’t eat anything but salad but it was fun to get to know some of the sisters better.  After the dinner was over we played a game and then the relief Society President, Sister Boothe, spoke.  She talked about the power we have as women and daughters of God and how much we are capable-- of especially when we all work together.  We had just done a quilt and children's book service project and they had everything that was made or collected on display. It was amazing what our little group of sisters had accomplished.  I don’t remember the number but it was A LOT!  
Then she talked about the miracles that they had experienced as a ward recently due to united prayer.  In closing she told the sisters about me and asked them all to join in a special Relief Society fast that Thursday night in my behalf.  She expressed her testimony of the power that comes from fasting a prayer and especially as a united group of sisters.  I was so humbled to be in that room and could not keep the tears back as I felt the love of each one of those sisters and the love of my Heavenly Father knowing that He is aware of me.  What a wonderful blessing it is to be apart of such an amazing organization as Relief Society and to have so many wonderful women, some of whom I don't even know, fasting and praying for me. I know the power a righteous group of women carries and I am so grateful.  

It was a day full of miracles and love. As I got on my knees my heart was full of thanksgiving for a loving Heavenly Father who knows and loves me and also a ward family who works to emulate the Savior in word and deed.  

2 comments:

  1. Your strength is inspiring!!!! Guardian angels are real and we have felt their influence in our family too! Hang in there, we are praying for you in our home too!! (friends of Donny and Crystal)

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  2. MRIs have always made me nervous too. I went through a few years when I had to get them every month and it was a very stressful period. I think the most stressful was the drive to the hospital and the waiting in the gown. But the machine is an amazing thing and has definitely helped in my speedy recovery.

    Kacey @ Glendale MRI

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